Men Are Just Happier People

Men Are Just Happier People. What do you expect fromsuch simple creatures? Your last name stays put. Thegarage is all yours. Wedding plans take care ofthemselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive toanother petrol station toilet because this one is just too dirty. You don't have to stop and think of whichway to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress costs £1500. ATux rental is only £100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch ispractically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, ormangle your feet. You have one mood all the time.Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. Youknow stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. Youget extra credit for the slightest act ofthoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, heor she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is £7.00 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never havestrap problems in public. You are unable to seewrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your facestays its original colour.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can playwith toys all your life. Your belly usually hides yourbig hips. You need only one wallet and one pair ofshoes. You want only one colour for all seasons. Youcan wear shorts no matter how your legs look! You can "do" your nails with a penknife. You have freedom ofchoice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives onDecember 24 in 25 minutes. You don't freak out whenyou go to a party and see another man wearing the same shirt, instead you become buddies.

No WONDER men are happier...